What's the best part of being sober?

The definition of sober: 1. not affected by alcohol; not drunk 2. serious, sensible and solemn. Sober is never and has never been perceived by the British general public as a fun pass time. We're sober when we go to work, sober when we go through our day to day slog, sober during tough conversations, or when we watch the news. We're fun people when we go out and socialize, we're fun at parties, down the pub after work, when we drink. The sober people had always been perceived as the boring people, the alcoholics or the goody two shoe prudes. One of the great things about being sober is that you find out the secret truth, that no-one else seems to get until later on in life, being sober can be incredibly fun and even better than booze.

I'm sat on my bed typing up this blog post knowing that tomorrow (the day I post this, aka today, for those reading on the 2nd of October) I will be 9 months sober. I kicked the habit 9 months ago, on the 2nd of January having had my last drink; a gluten-free Perroni, the night before. Sure if I had to redo it a gluten-free beer may not be my last drink of choice, but I'm not about to break my sobriety for "the last drink", besides my first ever alcoholic drink was a beer so it seems fitting to have ended on one too. The last 9 months have been interesting, to say the least, and I'm very proud of my progress thus far. So proud I even wrote a comment on a Sober for October Instagram post saying: "I'll be 9 months sober tomorrow and I'm rather proud of myself 😊". What I didn't expect was a reply: "This is amazing!!! What's been the best part so far? X". As I went to type the answer I sat back and thought, 's#*t, what has been the best part so far?', I could reel you off a list of the negatives, and the difficult times but the best, that was going to take me a second to think about... And that is how I found myself laptop open and typing away to you my dear reader. 

Better Mental Health

The first pro in my sobriety list had to be the improvement in my mental health, and the improvements I have seen in my day to day life. 

What all the glossy ads, the masses of people in clubs and bars and festivals don't tell you is that alcohol is a Central Nervous System Depressant, it alters the chemicals in your brain, suppressing your more self-conscious side and altering the messages your brain then sends to the rest of your body. So alcohol makes people more relaxed, however, the more alcohol you consume the more the brain is affected, this is how people can become highly aggressive, anxious or depressed. After drinking for a while, or drinking regularly our brain decreases the levels of serotonin uptake. This means that the drink that usually helps you to chill out is actually damaging the chemical in your brain that helps make you happy. 

I used to think that alcohol helped me feel a little less anxious in situations and at first felt lost without the security blanket of a sip or two to help me relax. Now I can do the things I used to do without the need for alcohol and actually find I'm less anxious and depressed overall. After a night out, I used to wake up and feel depressed, now after I night out I wake up a little tired but ready and motivated for the next day. Don't get me wrong it was difficult at first and sometimes still is, there'll be occasions when I think, 'oh I could do with a drink now', but knowing I can have an ace time without one is incredibly empowering. I'm happier in my day to day life and I have more motivation, am more productive and don't need a booze blanket. 

No More Hangovers 

One of the best things about not drinking is not having hangovers. Those piercing headaches, stomach pains, tiredness, need for greasy food, not being able to stomach food, the vomiting, and the post alcohol poops, and declaring the empty words "eurgh, I'm never drinking again". TMI? We've all been there and I for one am very happy to leave that chapter of my life in the past. All those things we blame the alcohol for but are really self-inflicted, I drank the alcohol, I made myself feel that way, and I don't know about you but that's just not my jam. 

No More Hangxiety

So you've just woken up from a night out, you're home safe in your bed but haven't got a clue about what happened the night before and you're wondering wtf actually happened, how you made it home and who you saw or spoke to. Oh, or that moment when you're tagged in umpteen photos from the night before, either on Facebook, or Instagram stories and maybe even someone's Insta feed. Picture this, waking up from a night out, remembering how you got back in your bed, and being tagged in photos you don't mind being on the internet for the world to see. I know which one I Prefer.

Hello Memory

Anyone who knew me a few years back would tell you I had the worst memory, we used to joke about my goldfish memory, or how it was theoretically a siv. Don't get me wrong, becoming sober was not a miracle cure for my recall, but it has improved in leaps and bounds. I now remember moments I thought had been erased, and even if I don't remember everything, I'll at least remember to write most things down.

No more Fake Friends 

I used to be the girl that was always up for a night out, always ready to party, and dance the night away. Don't get me wrong I'm still happy to get my glad rags on and roll out the door to dance my feet sore but I'll do so with my good mates. Gone are the fake friends, the ones only interested in you for a night out or when they need cheering up. This may seem like a con to some people who feel the need to be surrounded by others, but having those close pals, friendships, where you support each other, as well as having an ace time, is infinitely better.

Better Health

Maybe this should have been first. I once received a certificate for most illnesses within a year. (True story) Much like my memory, anyone who knew me a few years back would tell you that I was ill all the time (believe me when I say this is not an exaggeration). At one point I was admitted to hospital every year with one problem or another and up to the doctors more times than I can count, it was a difficult time and affected my work, my income, my friendships. I was told for years that I was just unlucky and that people with anxiety are more stressed, which in turn suppresses the immune system and makes one prone to more illness

Now, again I'm not saying sobriety was a miracle cure, I still get ill, but not half as much as I used to. I'm so much healthier, I feel lighter (if that makes sense), I'm a healthier weight, and I'm pretty sure my liver is a happy chap too.

I Sleep Better

Back when I was drinking, I was diagnosed with an illness called insomnia. If you haven't heard of it before Insomnia basically means you regularly have problems sleeping, this could include problems falling asleep, staying asleep or both. Despite many people believing that having a drink will "knock them out" thanks to it's sedating effects (which I was advised on many times), alcohol -even when consumed 6 hours before bedtime- can affect the second cycle of sleep, causing you to wake up prematurely and have difficulty getting back to sleep.
I've managed to get a regular sleeping pattern in place since ditching the booze and my insomnia will only come out to play if I'm overly anxious about a matter or event in my near future.
Sleep is beautiful and indisputably important.

Appreciate the Little Things 
How often do you stop and smell the roses? A character trait that a friend actually recognized in me since becoming sober is that I take time for the little things. I'll stop and take time to appreciate something we often take for granted, the smell that drifts out a bakery on my commute to work, a clear night's sky, and the twinkling stars when I have to let the dog out for a wee at 3am, the way someone lights up when they talk about their passion. It's something I used to do now and again, or notice on the off-chance but I feel as though I notice and appreciate those moments a lot more now.

I'm a Better Person
Not only are the eight subjects mentioned above great for me, but they've also been pretty good for others too. Since ditching the booze I have become a better person, a better daughter, sister, friend. I make time for other people and actually engage and listen to what people are saying. I don't offer someone a drink or a boozy night for starters and mains where headaches and regrets are served as dessert. I'll take time to understand a situation, suggest a feel-good activity, or simply support whoever needs a pillar to dust themselves off and get back up again. I see and appreciate the effort that others make, and it's strengthened my relationships. I've become more educated, understanding, and I make better decisions. I know I still have room for improvement, and I'm eager to learn more. I'm still one of the worst at keeping in contact with people although I have been slowly making my way through my contacts and checking up on friends rather than just liking their posts. Long story short, I take more care of myself than I used to and in turn, I'm able to care better for others and my relationships with them.

Overall, I feel better than when I was drinking, I feel lighter, healthier and a little more awake, (I'm not sure if this makes sense, does anyone else feel the same?). I've stopped taking a drug that negatively altered my mindset, thinking patterns and made my body feel horrible. I can walk into a room full of strangers, I can dance the night away, I can have a meal, meet new people, all without the need for "dutch courage".
You want to know what the best part about being sober is? Rediscovering who I am, learning that I'm actually a lot stronger and more confident than I ever thought and learning that life and relationships without beer goggles are pretty beautiful. Choosing sobriety was the best decision I ever made.

Are you going to go Sober for October? or have you already kicked the habit and if so, what's been the best part of your journey so far?